Since I last blogged, the following has occurred in my immediate circle of family/friends: one misdiagnosis of a serious illness followed by an all-clear (mine), one real diagnosis of an even more serious illness (not mine but close enough to warrant on-going concerned caring and attention to a loved one), one stable and long-term source of funding ended necessitating the search for new source of income (several of us), one family wedding best left un-attended for reasons anyone who is part of an extended and dysfunctional family would understand (all of us) and finally, on a happier but still stressful note: first and/or early encounters with both the grown children’s’ significant others…But you know what I have to say to all this? What midlife crisis? “Time Magazine” started it and it’s been picked up by all the media. But my response is simple and to the point. When hasn’t our generation been in crisis? The real news here is how well I/we/all of us are doing, despite the many challenges life brings our way.
I remember back in the 60’s, when for a year or so, every time you saw somebody with long hair or a beard, you felt that you were in some kind of private club together. Justified or not, you felt like you could trust that person to share your values. Together, you could change the world.
I get that same feeling now, only it’s not young girls with long hair and boys with beards. It’s women at midlife and beyond. When we see each other in restaurants, taking a walk in the park, in the workplace, there’s a spontaneous sympatico. Once again, there is the “in-crowd” feeling that we probably share many of the same values and perspectives. Without having to actually do it, we sense that we could start a conversation and take it to a deep and meaningful place within a few sentences, if we so choose.
My savings aren’t where we think they should be, and the thought is dawning on us that we will need to work forever? The younger people at work are eyeing our jobs like a hungry pack of wolves? Our mothers won’t use their hearing aids and we’ve got sore throats from shouting? We don’t even need to voice our issues out loud to know that we’re in this together and that together, we will somehow all make it through.
Carol Orsborn